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Monthly Archives: May 2012

The Jamaican Zombies

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Yes that is correct, we have zombies in Jamaica and no they do not prey upon the “uninfected”.  They are easily identified by their obviously bleached out faces and being fully covered from head to toe in the extremely hot sun to prevent re-pigmentation from occurring. These walking dead are not proud with their naturally dark brown and even light brown skins. Funny enough what started out as a “female thing” caught on to the men (they were once called Joe Bleach). This plague, or epidemic, or outbreak, or whatever you want to call it, is not a modern-day occurrence. Ever since slavery many of our ancestors, and even some of our people, were taught that being black was a bad thing.

“Anyt’ing black no good.” – Ma Aggy (excerpt from Old Story Time by Trevor D. Rhone)

It’s not just in Jamaica we have bleaching or issues with our skin tone, Beyoncé and Aishwarya Rai are examples of celebrities whose skin tones were made lighter in magazines (Involuntary or Forced Bleaching), but some celebrities obviously did some “toning” of their own in real life without being “photoshopped”.

So what makes the Jamaican Zombie unique? Well, like zombies portrayed in movies, their bleached skin tones are uneven (so not up to par with those who can afford the full body version), thus giving them an unnatural, somewhat not-alive look. In common cases, only their faces are bleached and the rest of their bodies are significantly darker (according to Mr. Lex they are Monkeys, referring to how chimpanzees look, not intended to be racially offensive), while others may do their entire bodies but any skin covering the joints somehow is still darker.

Why all this bleaching? Believe it or not, in a lot of cases they do it to get ahead in life. Shocked? If big companies (not naming anyone) are demanding that training institutions (my lips are sealed) provide them with people of a lighter shade to be at the front desk, then I guess you have to lighten up (pun intended) to get your career started (oh by the way this was an article in our local newspaper).

Just out of fun, please feel free to take part in the poll below. Thanks. See you soon.

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